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Wednesday: Guy-the-Great-Terrorist.

Written by:Irene
Published on October 30th, 2015 @ 02:36:00 pm , using 525 words
Posted in Guy the invincible

Once upon a time Guy used to do some really odd jobs. For instance, he worked for a sex-shop in Barcelona - the huge company with branches and franchises all over the world. So, it happened that one of such franchise was established in Munich - not so far from the Bahnhof. One sunny morning (to be exact - it was Wednesday. The Thirteen - that's a bad omen, right?) his boss asked him to fly to Munich and present 18 (eighteen) new models of vibrators to the most valued potential Bavarian customers. Well, Guy liked to travel almost as much as he liked women - and in an hour he was at the airport.

Flight was terrific, no second pilot got crazy, and they landed in Munich safely. Our hero stopped by at the nearest coffee shop - to catch some espresso and a croissant. And - yes, we admit it! - he made a big mistake: he dropped his bag, full of ready-to-act vibrators, on the floor. Here came a sleepy cleaner with his vacuum-machine, and - ca-boom! - hit that bag. All the vibrators started to work at once. Some just made a noise. Some sung as a bird, some... whatever. Oh, it could be a magnificent advertising for a company where he used to work, believe me - if... if not that stupid, over-protective bartender, who read a hell lot of newspapers, and knew everything about terrorists! OK, the bartender is always... right. And he pushed certain red button! Bingo!

In a half-a-minute a full dozen of brave Bavarian cops arrived. Their bodies were heavily armored, and they wore helmets, and those amazing Heckler-Koch toys were with them indeed. In a moment or so they evacuated every last person from the cafe, put a very bright plastic barrier around that ticking-mumbling-singing bag, and called for a bomb-squad with their robots and so on.

Our Guy tried to explain - in a very poor German, we've to admit - that all this is just a mistake, and he had no bomb - only the sex-toys in his baggage. Brave cops did not understand him - well, they caught the only fact that HE was a luggage owner - and! One-Two-Three! - our hero is already on the floor, his hands handcuffed behind his back, and on his butt is a huge German Shepard sitting most comfortably. Dog became agitated too - because Guy had usually some pot with him - just in case.

And to tell you the truth, the police dogs in Germany are not exactly enthusiastic about recreational drugs, believe me... So, long or short - but the bomb squad arrived. Robotic arm opened the bag - and... the very first thing it caught was a huge and a very realistic dick. The black one. Moaning and screaming. All other things found were in general the same...

In a half an hour or so, hoarse from laughing cops and a bomb-squaders recalled Guy (still handcuffed, and with a dog on his butts), and very politely asked him - how does he feel. One of them, removing handcuffs even asked - isn't he a mazo, and if yes - was it fun enough for him. Well... after that story Guy didn't come to Munich anymore. Never.

Location: New York, United States

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